


You Are My Forever

by kilrys



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff and Pain, M/M, bc i think they are really sweet, bc pain is still pain, but prepare your heart for shattering feels???, i think it's fluffy???, just... prepare your heart... orzzz, yet i hope u feel the love???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2016-01-07
Packaged: 2018-05-12 09:53:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5661982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kilrys/pseuds/kilrys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oikawa is not fond of love letters, except if they're from his best friend (then more than definitely he is). Iwaizumi seems to have a liking on handmade gifts and he did not need to say for his best friend to know. They both started a little slow but they really hoped for forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Are My Forever

**Author's Note:**

> I really worked hard on this I hope you like it! Comments are much appreciated.  
> Also, please get ready for feels yay!

_Birds hum just outside their room. They are liveliest in the morn._

_“Hey, Tooru.” Hajime’s voice was almost a whisper._

_“Mm?” Oikawa tightened his fingers entangled on the other’s, both their eyes still on the movie they were watching in the bedroom._

_Hajime leaned his head on Oikawa’s shoulder. “Do you love me?”_

_Oikawa felt a lump form in his throat._

 

 

-

 

 

“You’ve got another letter from one of your fans?” Iwaizumi peeked through Oikawa’s shoulder as he opened his locker.

Oikawa raised his hand and proudly waved a pink, sweet-smelling envelope. “Yup, Iwa-chan! You jealous?”

Iwaizumi didn’t even bother to give a smack on his head. “It’s probably that girl.” He pointed out to the long-haired, petite girl looking at the ground, hands fidgety, and friends on the background trying to keep their cheer a whisper and obviously failing.

“It breaks my heart to reject these cute girls,” Oikawa sighed. This time, Iwaizumi wanted to smack his head.

“Why don’t you just try dating one?” He can’t help but pitifully look at the girl waiting from afar. “You don’t even read their letters anymore.”

“I’d only read them if they’re from you,” Oikawa shamelessly pouted.

“What the heck?” Iwaizumi grunted. “Just get that done so we could go home. I’m tired.”

“So cold, Iwa-chan!” he replied with a long face.

He walked to the girl anyways and his best friend arranged his stuffs in his bag as he waited.

 

 

-

 

 

“Go ahead of me,” Iwaizumi said, finishing a gulp of water. “Can’t walk home with you today.” The vice captain is especially sweaty today for getting too fired up on last practice before a few days break for Christmas.

“Eh?” Oikawa flattened his hair dripping wet battling Iwaizumi’s to dry with the towel in his hand. “Are you keeping your date away from me?” he pouted. “We’re best friends. I’m not gonna steal her, Iwa-chan! ”

“Girlfriend? What?” Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow. “Just because I’m not going home with you today means I’m dating?” He tugged his gym clothes in his bag and slung the strap in his hand on his shoulder. “Some intense imagination you’ve got. Mom asked me to the supermarket. I’m going.”

“You’re not on a date?” Oikawa sighed. “Still, I’m tagging along!” He grabbed Iwaizumi’s arms before he could slip out of the locker room. “What are we buying?” he asked, beaming a dashing smile.

It just took seconds and years of friendship for Iwaizumi to know there’s no escape, not when it’s Friday and about to be on holiday break. “Groceries for Christmas.”

 

The grocery store just took them about half an hour of stride to get into. Could have been faster if Oikawa didn’t get distracted about anything and everything on the road like it’s his first time taking the way.

“What’s the first on the list?” Oikawa asked enthusiastically as he pulled a cart like he’s no older than eight. “That’s where we’ll start.”

“Bread.”

“But the bread is on the other side?? Too far!”

“Yea, but you asked??” There’s no hope nor peace when it’s with Oikawa but he followed him on the nearest end lane anyway and they went through each one while checking out every items.

“What present do you want Iwa-chan?” Oikawa blurted out of the blue as Iwaizumi was shuffling through cans of milk.

“Don’t need one,” Iwaizumi replied uninterested.

“Aaah you're no fun, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa groaned. “Volleyball shoes?”

“I actually just got a new one,” he answered, eyes reading brands thinking which to pick.

Oikawa’s brows furrowed. “Jacket?”

“You know I have more than enough.”

“Chocolates?”

“Too sweet.”

“You’re so picky, Iwa-chan!”

Iwaizumi walked on when he finally got to decide which one to buy. “Told you don’t want any.”

“Maybe another handmade scarf like last year?”

“You said it yourself, I have one. You gave it last year.”

“Then another one!”

“I only have one neck, Oikawa.” He stopped in front of pastas this time.

“Then you only have one pair of clothes because you surprisingly just have one body?”

“Okay. There’s a thing I want,” Iwaizumi suddenly turned his head on his ever so noisy friend, “some peace and quiet, Shittykawa. Please?” then he turned back on the shelf of goods.

“Hmm.. How about a pair of gloves?” Oikawa brightly asked like some kid who had an answer for a teacher’s question and definitely deaf of what Iwaizumi just said.

The other gave him a glance, then, a stare. _What in shut up does this idiot doesn’t understand?_ He’s even still smiling at him. Like an idiot. Totally.

“And handmade, of course!”

Iwaizumi sighed in utter defeat. “Fine.”

“What would be your gift to me, then?”

 _What did I do to deserve this?_ “A smack to shut you up.”

“A smack on the lips?” Oikawa asked excitedly, puckering the lids of his mouth.

“Gladly with my fist.”

“So rude, Iwa-chan. Then just buy me an alien designed jacket!”

“Who the hell in the right mind at this age would go out and buy an alien jacket?”

“Won’t you? For your best friend?”

“Not happening.”

“Mm, a handwritten personal letter from you!”

“Do you seriously need to ask for that whenever there’s an occasion to give gifts?”

“I won’t anymore if you’d give me one on Christmas.”

“Why don’t you obsess over your fans’ letters instead?”

“I want yours.”

“God, Oikawa. We meet every day.”

“It’s Christmas! Please?”

“An alien whatever jacket then.”

“With a letter?”

“Or none.”

 

 

 

“I thought you bought the whole store, my dear.” Iwaizumi’s mom put the groceries on the fridge and some in the cabinet. “What took you so long?”

“Oikawa,” Iwaizumi sighed.

“Oh,” she chuckled. “Why didn’t you invite him for dinner, then?”

“My eardrums are crying, mom.” Iwaizumi stated as if pissed but _oh, is he?_ “He’s endless.”

 

Iwaizumi’s mom’s smile was knowing.

 

 

-

 

 

“I thought you don’t read them?”

Eyes wide obviously startled. “Huh?” his voice echoing the emptied classroom.

“Letters from your fans,” Iwaizumi said, glancing on the paper in his hand. “Or is it special for today because it’s Valentine’s?”

“Ah, this?” Oikawa folded the thing in defense, almost placing it under his desk. “It’s nothing, Iwa-chan.” He’s now seemingly more calm with that smile he tried to plaster on his face but definitely hiding something.

“Really, now?” Iwaizumi does not tease.

Oikawa plastered a really to-annoy-for grin. “Jealous or lonely because you didn’t get any? Which one?”

But Iwaizumi’s smart enough not to be led by his tricks. “That doesn’t seem to be like the usual –flowery, pink, sweetened paper.” His voice went low. “And you were making a weird face reading that. Something I don’t think anyone would wear reading some tooth-aching letter.” He sounded worried than simply curious. “Is there something wrong?”

“It’s a letter.” Oikawa looked down, hands getting a little sweaty.

“Yes?” Iwaizumi waited patiently for some real reply.

“A...” he’s a little too nervous, “love letter.”

“So,” Iwaizumi cleared his throat, “you like her?”

“No!” Oikawa almost jumped out of his seat.

“Then what?”

Oikawa looked back on the ground. “It’s from a guy,” he whispered too soft.

“Uh.” Iwaizumi’s eyes wondered to the trees out the window, then to the sky, next to the setting sun. “Oh.” He sure reached some kind of outer space experience.

Both were speechless for minutes which seemed years. Iwaizumi never thought Oikawa could actually shut up.

 

 

It’s been a day. They never talked about it on their way home. They didn’t know how. It was Oikawa who initiated that afternoon after their practice. “He came up to me at lunch.”

Iwaizumi looked at him, his eyes inquiring. “I seriously wouldn’t mind. You’re my best friend either way.”

Oikawa wanted to bring up that _‘Iwa-chan~!’_ with a compulsory pouty face but he knows when things are inappropriate. “He’s kind and.. it’s different. He is different. It would have been nice but,” he set his breathing evenly, “I rejected him.”

Oikawa is flirty and clingy and loud just like the girls fawning over him but he surprisingly prefers partners who are not quite. He wants simple. Opposite attracts, you could say. They’re best friends and those years of getting along _and not_ have been enough for them to read each other like their favorite book. It wouldn’t be weird for Oikawa to like a guy. He knows. “But you said he’s nice?”

“Yes,” he said quite hesitantly but _yes._

“Then why?”

Oikawa shrugs.

“Because we’re going to college in few months?” Iwaizumi asked. “Long distance would be hard but it could work out.”

“I know but nope. Not really.”

Oikawa seemed moved by the letter. He would tell so now he’s curious. “Then why?”

Oikawa’s face eased up lightly. “Because you’re dumb, Iwa-chan,” he said in banter and a tongue sticking out.

The tension he didn’t realize was there then flushed away. “What?” Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow and a book definitely ready to swat the annoying fly named Oikawa.

Oikawa skillfully dodged the bind of papers. “Now I think I regret it.” He ran few more steps away from Iwaizumi, taking his bag on the way. “He’s not rude as you and definitely wouldn’t leave my beautiful skin bruised.”

The now grumpy friend grabbed his own bag. “Then marry him, Shittykawa!”

 

Iwaizumi sighed of relief.

 

 

-

 

 

“Congratulations.”

“Same to you.”

The gymnasium was silent with the two of them but loud in their memories of the ball touching their hands and the floor, teammates calling out _‘mine’_ , rigorous breathing from too much practice, people cheering for them, heated arguments with their body and mind too tired, and of trust screaming among the team.

Iwaizumi hears a sniffle but didn’t talk. Instead, he waited.

“I don’t want to leave, Iwa-chan.” Oikawa’s voice drowned in tears he held back.

“Stupid. You should have failed your subjects then.” Iwaizumi’s own eyes sting. “Me too. But goodbyes can't be helped, Oikawa.”

He lost the last string of strength he had. “I’m gonna miss volleyball, Iwa-chan. I—,” breathless from too much tears and heartache, “I’m gonna miss our team.” He cried too loud. “I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to.”

Iwaizumi’s own heart tightened seeing his captain like that. “Yes, I know.” He took Oikawa to his shoulder and patted his head. “We all do, Tooru.” His heart tightened even more knowing he can’t do anything to make the tears stop. It hurt all over.

 

They stayed inside over the lunch until Oikawa somehow regained himself then walked out of the gym, after a final look, to find their friends.

Iwaizumi stopped when he did not hear steps following him. He turned to Oikawa who was looking at him intently. “What?”

Oikawa’s lips curled to a smiled but his eyes were the saddest when he gazed at them. “I’m gonna miss you most, Hajime.”

A gust of air and leaves passed in response. It was just that for a minute.

“It’s not like we’ll never see each other again,” Iwaizumi started. “We’re still best friends.” He slowly took steps, making the gap between them smaller. “We have trains and phones, Shittykawa.”

Oikawa stood cold in front of his best friend. “But we’ve always been together. I just don’t know how..”

“We both decided on this,” Iwaizumi’s voice almost empty.

“I know. And I sound funny, eh?” Oikawa let out a chuckle then looked away. “What’s with you today, Iwa-chan? You should have just hit me on the head so I would stop being so dramatic.” He took a step to end his cliché drama. “Let’s go, Iwa—”

Iwaizumi wrapped an arm around Oikawa. “I’ll miss you more, idiot.” He felt Oikawa smile.

“Iwa-chan is so nice today. You don’t have to say that just to comfort me.” Oikawa tapped Iwaizumi’s back. “Let’s go back. I’m fine now.”

Iwaizumi’s hold just got tighter. “I’ll miss you so much that I wouldn't want to let go.”

Oikawa resigned and rested his head on Iwaizumi’s shoulder. “Don’t do this, Iwa-chan. You,” he sighed, “you don’t understand.”

Iwaizumi stepped back, his hands on Oikawa’s shoulders, eyes fixed on one another. “I love you, Tooru.”

Oikawa would almost shame the roses with the color of his face. “W-what?”

“Nothing. Too bad you didn’t hear.” Iwaizumi was genuinely grinning. He was turning back and added on a serious note, “Those feelings are mine. You don’t have to return them back.”

He ran fast in front of Iwaizumi and his hands instinctively grabbed Iwaizumi on the waist. “I love you more,” Oikawa almost screamed. “I love you. I love you. I love you, Hajime!” Iwaizumi hugged him back.

“Thank you.” He took Oikawa’s hand and continued their much postponed stroll back.

 

 

It was quite a crowd in front of their building but to Oikawa’s height advantage, their friends were pretty easy to spot and they were one of the noisiest among them. “There they are, Iwa-chan!” he said, pointing to the group of familiar faces.

Iwaizumi took his hand knotted with the setter’s. “Go ahead of me. I’ll just go get some stuffs I left in the room.”

Oikawa suddenly felt a twist in his stomach. _Oh, yea. We’re_ guys _after all. Holding hands in this crowd? What was I thinking?_ “Be back fast, okay?” He managed to retort to his usual smile before Iwaizumi could notice then they went on their ways.

Oikawa joined the circle of loud students who immediately asked about their vice captain and told them where he was but nothing of what happened between them. He’s back to being their cheerful captain.

Along the talks about planning where to go and eat afterwards, Oikawa heard a voice from his back, “Tooru,” then he turned. A bunch of roses in hue of lavender made his face immediately grow into unimaginable surprised expression.

“B-but Iwa-chan? I thought...” He turned around him looking worried.

The team yelled cheers and teases for the two.

“Finally, Iwaizumi-san?”

“Congratulations, senpai!”

“I thought it will take you forever.”

“At last.”

Oikawa grew confused. “You knew?”

“It was _obvious_ ,” they said almost in chorus.

Oikawa looked at the man, _his_ man, holding out flowers to him in querying face but Iwaizumi just shrugged and smiled at him. “You’re embarrassing me, Iwa-chan~!” He feels the blood rushing to his cheeks then took the bouquet from Iwaizumi.

“Thank you, Iwa-chan!” He hugged him again tightly. “You made me so happy,” he whispered.

 

 

 

Their dinner out was fun with inevitable crying in between. Iwaizumi took his best friend, who’s now double ranked with being the boyfriend, home.

“Good night, Iwa-chan,” he said with their hands accustomed so fast to holding each other’s.

But before they slip away, Iwaizumi handed something to Oikawa. “Here,” then kissed his forehead. “Sleep tight.”

Oikawa smiled so bright the sky would not need the moon.

 

 

He read the letter again and again that night and for the days that came; it was just the best thing in the world.

 

 

-

 

 

The struggle on first few months of living separately and going to different universities was something they both knew coming. It was hard obviously for Oikawa but just because Iwaizumi was great at acting the matured one. They got by chatting, calling, and meeting on weekends to fill the longing in their hearts.

 

“Happy anniversary, Hajime,” Oikawa pecked a kiss on the lips of his lover. “The stars are lovely. Thanks for taking me here.”

“Sure thing,” Iwaizumi had his hands find its way on Oikawa’s, “as long as you’re happy.” His free hand pocketed for an envelope. “Happy anniversary, Tooru,” he mumbled kissing Oikawa’s hand and handing him a letter.

Oikawa blinked too fast not to let the waters run. He didn’t know happiness could be this much. “I thought you’d never give me another one again. I’ve asked you for one so many times before even though we’re lovers, Iwa-chan.”

“You ask for them too often, idiot.” He stared at the stars as if they’re countless Oikawas.

“Because I miss you a lot,” he smiled softly. “This one is for you.” Oikawa let out a piece of box with ribbon on top to Iwaizumi.

“I hope you didn’t stay too late doing whatever this is again,” Iwaizumi said claiming the box from Oikawa. “You really didn’t have to, but thank you.”

“I know you like the handmades I do with lots of love, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa said bringing out his signature perky face and a peace sign.

“Anything from you, Oikawa,” he said looking at his lover in the eyes—too pure, too intimate.

Oikawa’s cheeks turned from milk to strawberry real quick. “Stupid, Iwa-chan,” he said to himself.

“Hmm?” said the guy who sadly didn’t catch the deal, still staring at Oikawa like waiting for some piece of art to speak.

 _Really stupid, Iwa-chan!!_ “I said I love you so much, Iwa-chan!” playful with his voice, he managed to cover up.

 

It was a real comeback, though.

 

 

-

 

 

In two years, they finally figured out they can’t live away from each other for too long. They became too busy with school works and practices in their new teams. Everyday calls turned to short messages which barely made it to the day and weekly meet-ups to quick day dates once a month, so they decided to live together. They found a place in between their universities so they had a fair spend on travel. It was farther from their schools, yes, but definitely more bearable if it meant to be more boyfriend time.

They did quite an amount of adjustments though. They were both neat on their things but Oikawa would get so loud when cramming which was a lot. Iwaizumi does not cook which Oikawa had foreseen that needed fix. They’d waste their allowance if Iwaizumi would go on spending eating out. It was fine when he was by himself but not when there are two of them now. Oikawa had to do the cooking the first weeks and taught Iwaizumi about the kitchen little by little.

They were a mess of misfits but they came to figure out how to be each other’s puzzle piece. It was mostly fun.

They graduated after lots of crying on thesis and practical works but they did, even with minor injuries from volleyball along the way.

Two years of working: Oikawa on being a professional volleyball player (must be his call) and Iwaizumi still choosing between volleyball or continuing in medicine. A few bumps on the road but swiftly sailing with 6 love letters in Oikawa’s secret box. It’s been six years and they never thought it would end so fast.

 

 

-

 

 

“Seven or eight months at most.”

They were deafened by sound of the words. Their bodies paralyzed with whatever emotions they could not bother to name.

“His sickness has spread too far in his body and it still is, faster as we speak,” the person dressed in white continued. “Slowing it down maybe for a few months would be the best we could do. I’m so sorry.”

The earth and sky definitely stopped right at their feet and they wish it would just. And maybe, _just maybe_ , they heard it wrong.

It was Iwaizumi who broke the silence. “What procedures should I best undergo from here?”

 

 

-

 

 

Hajime still managed an anniversary letter. Eight months turned to a little more than a year. They were more than glad but no, they both would have cursed for endless years. _Or just a few more so they could get ready._ It was impossible.

“Tooru, let’s go home.”

Oikawa looked at Iwaizumi who had lost even the energy to smack him. He’s gone too pale and skinny. He was there but not getting any better. They were both hanging by a thread. “But Hajime, you...” he bravely held his tears back in front of his lover, “okay, we’ll go home.”

 

 

-

 

 

Iwaizumi smiled a lot more genuinely this time than when he was bedded at the hospital. He was eating a lot too, in moderation, of course; maybe because it was Oikawa tending to his food fresh from the kitchen all the time. Oh did he mention how much he loved Oikawa’s cooking to the point he pretended not to learn so he’d still cook a lot.

Two months and each day, felt heaven and hell at the same time. Oikawa never wanted to sleep just to wake up not knowing if Hajime would still me there. He was scared as hell.

On days he’d stay at the bathroom too long asking why it should be them, face all ruined with sobbing to tear the soul. He did not know how else to ask God to let Hajime stay with him yet, he asked too many times.

He cannot be weak in front of Hajime but his lover knew. How could he not? Oikawa would play movies or volleyball matches they used to take part in. Sometimes they would just hold hands by the veranda, rings a little cold around their fingers. Every so often, Oikawa would just whisper to Hajime how much he loves him and asks for more love letters (he reads them to him a lot too and at times Iwaizumi would blush).

 

 

-

 

 

_“Why the funny question, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa let out a breathy giggle. “I tell you all the time.”_

_“Then say it again now,” his voice both demanding and pleading but weak._

_Oikawa just stared at him as if printing every curve on his face in his memory. “I’d really, really love it if,” he sniffed and trying so hard not to slur a word, “you could stay even just a little longer.”_

_Hajime’s lips bent to the sweetest, softest smile Oikawa has ever seen—like an angel._

_“I love you in the misty beam of the mornings._

_I love you in the humid blows midday._

_I love you more than the stars the nights could hold._

_I love you, Hajime.”_

_Oikawa left a kiss on Hajime’s lips._

I love you more than you could imagine, Iwaizumi Tooru.

**Author's Note:**

> How was it??? Ohmygaaaad it's a secret that I personally cried writing the ending shh. I plan on a little epilogue but is it needed..?


End file.
